As the New Year is approaching, I know that many people are in the process of creating vision boards, setting lofty goals, or praying for dramatic “positive” changes in their lives. I’ve been there myself. I did as I was told, earnestly believing that if I did all the right things, I would manifest everything I deeply desired. Having a formula for relationships and for life feels safe; it takes out the uncertainty, the disappointment and the messy part where we get up-close and personal with the shadow parts of ourselves.
In my life, with more than a decade of self-development work, I see that manifestation of dreams can take months, sometimes years and certain dreams need to die, so that something deeper can be birthed, bringing us into greater alignment with a vaster energy that is guiding us.
As I sat by Pacific Ocean a few weeks ago and I simply felt into my upcoming year, I immediately felt a sense of EASE. My body relaxed and I felt surrendered.
I also realized that with ease come practices such as: surrender, letting go of control, and softening. That means, noticing when I trying to push through something, paying attention to moments when I become driven and stubborn in order to make something happen, it means being aware of when I am going into “I am alone” mode.
This is an experiment I am totally willing and excited to participate in this year!!!!
Now, if you wish, you can explore this question for yourself: What part of you wants to soften? Can you soften:
- your grip
- your shoulders
- your heart
- your gut
- your belly
- your defenses
- your hurts
- your mind
- you righteousness
- your eyes
- your base
- what else is inviting you….
I’d like to share these words of wisdom from Pema Chodron:
“How do we work with this tendency to block and to freeze and to refuse to take another step toward the unknown? The journey of awakening is one of continually coming up against big challenges and then learning how to soften and open. In other words, the paralyzed quality seems to be hardening and refusing, and the letting go or the renunciation of that attitude is simply feeling the whole thing in your heart, letting it touch your heart.
You soften and feel compassion for your predicament and for the whole human condition. You soften so that you can actually sit there with those troubling feelings and let them soften you more. The whole journey of renunciation, or starting to say yes to life, is first of all realizing that you’ve come up against your edge, that everything in you is saying no, and then at that point, softening.”
Source: “The Wisdom of No Escape”
Wishing you a blessed and easeful holiday season.